Who is your Dream Stealer?

Posted by neil on January 22, 2010
General

Do you have someone in your life that discourages you?

Are you ever really excited about an idea that you have, but then someone close to you convinces you otherwise?

Perhaps they convince you that the idea you have is not good, or perhaps they convince you that YOU are no good.

I like to call these people that discourage others, Dream Stealers.

Dream Stealers are everywhere and they are constantly trying to shatter the confidence of people close to them.

Dream Stealers are people who very readily, without solicitation offer their opinion. It is important to note that their opinion is always negative.

For instance, let’s look at the following example of a Dream Stealer in action.

You are tired of your current job and you are looking at making a job change. You have found a new job that you are really excited about. You are a bit nervous about applying for the new job, however, you know that the change will be good for you, and that you will really like the new role.

A Dream Stealer is someone that will put doubts into your mind. They will say such things as:

  • “You are not going to like the job.”
  • “The job is too hard.”
  • “There are more qualified people than you applying for the job. Don’t apply, it is a waste of time.”
  • “You are not smart enough for this new job.”
  • “If you take this new job and end up not liking it, you can never go back to your previous job.”

Dream Stealers can be close family members, spouses, friends, or co-workers.

I have noticed that there are 2 types of Dream Stealers. They are:

1) The Unintentional Dream Stealer

The Unintentional Dream Stealer is an individual who will discourage someone. They will provide their negative opinions to the person that they are close to. The unique feature of The Unintentional Dream Stealer is that they don’t even realize that they are discouraging the other person. The Unintentional Dream Stealer provides so many negative opinions to the other person, however, they don’t perceive this information as being negative at all. The Unintentional Dream stealer truly does not mean any harm to the other person. However, they don’t realize that they are indeed harming the other person with all of their negative opinions.
This type of Dream Stealer is more common then the next type of Dream Stealer we are going to discuss. The other type of Dream Stealer is the Intentional Dream Stealer.

2) The Intentional Dream Stealer

These people really have issues. They make it a point to go out and discourage other people intentionally. They do not want to see this other person succeed, so they feed them with a lot of negative thoughts in the hope that they will become discouraged and take no action at the end of the day. I have noticed a common trait with these types of Dream Stealers. They often lack self-confidence. I have also noticed that Intentional Dream Stealers often want to control situations, and as such they prey upon people with less self confidence than themselves. Their ultimate goal is that they will discourage someone completely from taking any action at all.

So how does this relate to real estate investment, and rental properties?

It relates in a major way.

Both Unintentional and Intentional Dream Stealers influence the decisions of real estate investors on a daily basis.

Surely, we all can think of at least one person that we know that is an Unintentional Dream Stealer. Again, this type of Dream Stealer does not mean any harm to the other person, as they don’t realize that their negative feedback, is actually negative.

I have seen more than one real estate investor influenced into changing their decisions due to the influence of an Unintentional Dream Stealer.

Some things that an Unintentional Dream Stealer could say to a real estate investor are:


  • “Are you sure you know what you are doing?”
  • “Buying anther property, could make us go bankrupt!”
  • “You don’t know enough about real estate market.”
  • “You are not a good property manager.”

Hopefully, not many of you know an Intentional Dream Stealer. If you do know of one, you know that they are always out to discourage you, put you down, and they like to shatter your confidence.

I have seen real estate investors be completely discouraged after speaking with an Intentional Dream Stealer. Intentional Dream Stealer will say things like this:

  • “You are a terrible real estate investor.”
  • “You have lost so much money investing in real estate, how much more are you going to lose on this new rental property?”
  • “You are not cut out to invest in real estate.”

We all know of and probably have Dream Stealer in our lives. It is important to recognize that someone is a Dream Stealer. Once you recognize who in your life is the Dream Stealer, you will be able to make the necessary adjustments in order to block our their negative opinions.  How do you block out their negative opinions?  Simple.  Don’t listen to them.

Easier said than done, I know!

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